HomePortalFAQSearchMemberlistUsergroupsRegisterLog in

Please be sure to sit out there, all you guests, and not log in. Oh, do lurk. We enjoy the lack of activity. It's so wonderful for the forum. Thank you soooo much for your dedication. Welcome to Bleach Online. We currently have lots of Elite spots open for the Quincy, Humans, Hollow, Zanpakutou Spirits. Plus Lieutenant, Fracciōn, and Vice-Elite spots open for all races. Don't be shy, and come on down and register.

The site is currently going through a Revamp. So certain things will slow down, such as application responses. However, once we have our revamp over, the site will return to its familiar luster. Just hold with us for a moment as we implement new rules and features to the site. This Revamp is expected to begin on 5/1/10 and shall conclude on 5/20/10. It will take a full ten days at least for the first half to conclude on account of size of staff and school.
http://souls-unleashed.forumotion.co/ Join, Join, Join. Better, active and everything you want!
Log in
Username:
Password:
Log in automatically: 
:: I forgot my password
Latest topics
» The would you? Could you? Game.
Thu Dec 10, 2015 8:47 pm by harrisonson

» Come and find one piece treasure
Sun Oct 25, 2015 9:29 pm by ardenz

» A free Browser game based on manga
Fri Oct 09, 2015 10:19 pm by ardenz

» 3D ARPG Game-GOW
Wed Sep 23, 2015 1:14 am by abbeytai

» Amazing Bleach Online
Tue Jul 28, 2015 4:10 am by ivanwilliam

» DBZ GAME
Wed Jul 08, 2015 8:32 pm by athenahatt

» bleach online
Thu Jul 02, 2015 3:13 am by adalxjing

» I support
Tue May 06, 2014 9:56 am by Tokujoro Seizen Το Κτήνος

» Arrancar Information
Tue May 06, 2014 9:55 am by Tokujoro Seizen Το Κτήνος

Top posting users this month
Who is online?
In total there are 2 users online :: 0 Registered, 0 Hidden and 2 Guests

None

Most users ever online was 108 on Sat Mar 22, 2014 4:24 pm

Share | 
 

 Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
AuthorMessage
Ryudou Nagare

avatar

Posts : 112
Points : 89
Join date : 2008-11-06
Age : 23
Location : On your mom

PostSubject: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Sat Feb 06, 2010 1:41 pm

Name: Nagare, Ryudou

Rank: Captain (4th Division to be specific)

Age: 131, 16

Appearance: Ryudou has brown hair and brown eyes, he loooks like your typical teenager except for the fact that he has lived for more then one century, and he is very muscular due to a Captain''s regimen. He is 5,11 and weighs 137 pounds, but his most striking characteristic is his smile which can help light up anybody's day, and has been used to cheer up wounded shingami in the hospital barracks. He has tanned skin that he has acquired from many a days traning in the sun. He commonly wears his Captains Haori over his standard shinigami robe like most Captains do. RYudou weards his sheath over his back as opposed to the standard waist location, he does this out of personal preference and nothing more. Whenever he is in a gigai he wears a very simple attire, blue jeans and a white tee, however over this he wears his signature piece of clothing a dress shirt with none of the buttons open so each side of it can hang in the wind. In special occasions, Ryudou has been known to wear a dark blue tuxedo and has also been known to wear it well.
Gender: Male

Personality: Ryudou has avery conflicting personality he is humorous and eccentric as well as an optomist, always looking for the good in people, like a child with a large amount of naviety. but he also knows the realities of war, due to him treating injuries sustained on the battlefield. He will follow commands to the best of his ability as long as they don't conflict with his rule. they cannot be cruel. He would commit "treason: to stop a cruel act from being completed on the weak and defenceless no matter the race, this idea could land him into trouble one day. Also Ryudou loves the ladies, he constantly will go up to one and attempt to flirt with mixed success. Kind and selfless most of the time, like anybody Ryudou has bad days in which he is sometimes very somber and looks to the past and remembers those that have come and gone, usually over sake. Generous and helpful, one of Ryudou's shortcomings is that he is not very selfish usually thinking about others before himself, he delights himself in the smiles they return, but becomes sad if they disregard his actions. He belives everyone deserves a second chance and that if you have the power to kill an opponent you have the power of not killing them and letting them live, this non-lethal attitude does not mean he will not kill, just he will kill as a last resort. However this attitude is only used on human looking races and not bestial hollows full of bloodlust.

Division: 4th

--------------------

(This piece is optional)

Hair Color: Brown

Likes: My character enjoys, cooking, sparring, healing people of they live, because if they do it is obviously a sad event., eating, and rescuing damsel's in distress. He also likes earth culture often bringing things back from trips into it.

Dislikes: My character hates cruelty, he finds it to be barbaric and he will always try to prevent it.

Crushes: Ryudou doesn't care about hair color as each has its own charms, he knows women come in different shapes and sizes as thier is no universal mold for being beautiful, he will care about a women who will care about him, and who is down to earth.
--------------------

Specialties: Cooking and being himself.

History: Born in the 54th section of the Rukongai, Ryudou had a typical life, growing up to be a farmer, until one day he came up upon a man in the road. This man had been horrible injured and needed medical attention; unfortunately the nearest clinic was miles away from that area, so he took the man to his nearer house. There he used his limited knowledge of a curator to tend to the man, though he used crude and unpolished methods he got the man through his injuries and he liked the experience he had. He began volunteering at the local clinic and getting more hands on experience on how to heal people. Over time his reputation grew as his skills did and he was given more critical conditioned patients. This was all fine and dandy until Ryudou became curious as to how to increase his skill. He wished to know how he could heal people more effectively, he began using his spiritual power he had slowly began to tap into, to try and heal injuries, while at first ineffective. It later became so useful that it began to get the attention of the Soul Society.

The Soul Society sent the former Captain of the 4th Division to welcome him into the shinigami ranks, she said that he would still have to go into the shinigami academy but, due to him discovering how to heal with reiastu all on his own passing would not be a problem. So Ryudou went into the Shinigami Academy and passed with flying colors impressing his superiors and quickly began gaining an impression amongst the Soul Society. When it came time for him to become a seated officer, their was still one requirement for him to accomplish gain shikai, after he did so he slowly progressed up the ranks to become a third seat.

One day when on a routine mission in the Real World around Karakura Town with his superior the Lieutenant of the 4th Squad, the worst happened. An Adjuchas class Arrancar appeared and began attacking the general area looking for smaller Hollows to eat. Along its way of destruction it came upon Ryudou and his superior. They fought it with all their might but it still seemed to prevail , it had stung the lieutenant several times and she was on the floor. Ryudou became overcome with fury and unleashed his signature kido against the opponent "Hado 40 Byakko of Rage", eight Byakko appeared in a circle around Ryudou's hand with a larger one in the middle, with his finger pointed like a trigger he fired it upon the Arrancar, who took the damage but remained alive. It began coughing and opened a garganta, saying before it left while it coughed " Interesting, Interesting, Ill let you live todat , but maybe one day we will meet again Shinigami". Ryudou then began tending to his lieutenant, using his zanpaktou to heal her, but she replied You might be able to get rid of the poison, but I have lost to much blood, soon you will be lieutenant..., NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Ryudou replied with tears on his face don’t start talking like that, I am going to heal you. No stop saying silly things Ryudou she replied We both know I won’t make it, but let me tell you this before I die, Ryudou you must take my mantle, protect the 4th Division, protect the Captain, and above all else protect the Soul Society. She then died, as Ryudou's tears feel on her lifeless body, he then pickd her her up and took her to be buried amongst her own. The following week Ryudou became the lieutenant of the 4th Squad.

Several Years later Ryudou's skill in kido had increased, as well as his relationship with his zanpatktou grew had. Throughoit trails and adventures his relationships with members of the Seretei increased making him a popular member of the 4th Division. Having watched his friends die and his hands as well as save others from death, Ryudou grew to be a puzzling character, despite these heavy experiences Ryudou became a cheerful light soul, he grew to enjoy interactions with people no matter who they were, he believe every interaction created a spark in which in the right enviroment could become a friendship. Throughout this time Ryudou grew in power and grew in respect in the Seretei, he even had the achievement of achieving Bankai a feat remarkable in itself but at such a young age it was even more remarkable. Soon Ryudou could handle missions Captain's could and would commonly go on a mission with his aging Captain, throughout every single one his Captain would import knowledge to him knowing that his time would soon come. And then one day it did, unexpectidly he died of old age, he knew it was his time and did not want medical science to prolong the invetible, and in his death bed he summoned all the other Captain's something the did not have to follow through with but did anyway. He asked that as his dying wish that Ryudou would succeud him, for such a bright soul was needed to balance all the gloom in the world, the other captain's unanimously concured for Ryudou had mastered Bankai and furfilled all the requrements, and with tears in his eyes Ryudou bid farewell to his Captain, and the title was such passed on. The next day Ryudou became 4th Division Captain.

Sample Chapter: Ryudou entered the circular room that was completly empty, except in the center which had some bread and water, this room had one reason and one reason only, it was the toom where shingami achieved thier Shikai. He put his sword on the floor in front of him and he began to meditate on his sword, but nothing happened. He waited for hours and hours and began to get agiatated having ate all of his bread, as well as dranken all of his water. Hours after that he began getting tired and was getting hungry but still nothing happened. After 15 hours of just laying in the room, extremely hungry and tired his eyes began to droop it was within that moment of awakenesss an sleep did his zanpaktou make contact with him.


Within that myraid of sleep and awakeness, Ryudou found himself on some clouds and looked up nd so that he was in a beautiful, he could hear music, and it smelled of paradise and he felt extremely happy. THen he perchanced to look down and what he saw was horrifying, it was ablaze and thier was darkness abound, it was a horriifci and ugly world. Now Flow understood he was in his Zanpaktou's realm, it reflected what his zanpaktou was. He looked around for his zanpaktou spirit until he saw this dimensions only other inhabitant. He saw a handsome man with blond hair and a halo, but he also saw that had a clawed hand and black angel wings, and his white robe was ripped up. The man then turned to him and said You done, looking at the landscape Ryudou. in a montone but yet superior voice. Ryudou responded Who are you. The man for a second look surpirised and then responded Who am I, what kind of question is that, Who the hell are you? He then looked down at the horrifying spectacle. Yes WHo the hell are you? He then returned to his montone voice.Jokes adide, Ryudou, I am you Zanpaktou.

The man did not wait for Ryudou to respond as he continued Yes thats right I am your zanpaktou, and you want my name don't you? Ryudou replied Yes I do so what is it. The man then shot him a sly smile Its not that easy, I have to feel you are deserving, I am going to ask you a question, why do you want shikai? Flow thought about it for a second So i can protect the Soul Society more effectively and heal people as well. The man looked at him again sheeplishly So, your a man of duty aye, no thats not going to work, you have to want things for yourself Ryudou, I am sorry but I am not going to give you my name. Ryudou became enraged What the hell is your name. The man then smiled, But, I see you have backbone, tell you what I will tell you my name even though i feel you don;t deserve my power, because I know you will have to beat one day to gain your Bankai, because I know you want to be wanted, you want to be famous, reknown, and for that you need to be a Captain, and for that you need a Bankai. There was a thin silence My name is, .... Lucifer.


Last edited by Ryudou Nagare on Fri May 14, 2010 4:42 pm; edited 6 times in total (Reason for editing : Taken Rommel's points.)
Back to top Go down
View user profile
The Hunter

avatar

Posts : 601
Points : 405
Join date : 2010-01-21
Age : 1016
Location : Eh, I don't tell losers

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Sat Feb 06, 2010 2:34 pm

Hmm, up to the captain, sorry. Mimic [4th division captain] will decide if you're good enough for LT.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Ryudou Nagare

avatar

Posts : 112
Points : 89
Join date : 2008-11-06
Age : 23
Location : On your mom

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Sat Feb 06, 2010 4:12 pm

I understand I have sent him a message.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Mr. Polk

avatar

Posts : 439
Points : 659
Join date : 2009-03-04
Age : 24
Location : Aurora, Colorado

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Sat Feb 06, 2010 7:25 pm

Approved until then.

_________________
Spoiler:
 
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Mimic

avatar

Posts : 17
Points : 64
Join date : 2009-05-09
Age : 26
Location : Locked in the bathroom.......Again

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Sun Feb 07, 2010 12:03 pm

Well, if it's cool with the higher ups, I'll accept you as my LT. Interesting story by the way.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Ryudou Nagare

avatar

Posts : 112
Points : 89
Join date : 2008-11-06
Age : 23
Location : On your mom

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Fri May 14, 2010 11:45 am

Okay i am reapplying with some edits to make a bit better.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Rommel

avatar

Posts : 50
Points : 30
Join date : 2010-03-13

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Fri May 14, 2010 12:41 pm

The appearance and personality should be expanded upon by a few sentences. Throughout your application you have several run-on sentences just because you use a comma when you should use a period. Below are two examples of such run-on sentences.

This was all fine and dandy but Ryudou became curious he wanted to know how he could heal people more effectively, he began using his spiritual power he had slowly began to tap into to try and heal injuries, while at first ineffective it became more useful and his healing powers increased, eventually gaining the attention of the Soul Society.

Run-on sentence. I would suggest putting a period after effectively.

They fought it with all their might but it still seemed to prevail , it had stung the lieutenant several times and she was on the floor, Ryudou over come with fury unleashed his signature kido against the opponent "Hado 40 Byakko of Rage", eight Byakko appeared in a circle around Ryudou's hand with a larger one in the middle, with his finger pointed like a trigger he fired it upon the Arrancar, who took the damage but remained alive, saying before it left in a garganta "maybe one day we will meet again Soul Reaper".

Another run-on sentence. Half-way through the third paragraph you refer to your character as "Flow" which, seems to not be in his name stated above.

Several Years later, Ryudou skill in kido and his relationship with his zanpatktou grew as well,

I think you meant his skill grew in kido not his skill in kido sense you placed as well at the end. However, if you meant his skill in kido and his relationship grew then you shouldn't place as well at the end. If you fix what i highlighted then I should be able to approve you.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Ryudou Nagare

avatar

Posts : 112
Points : 89
Join date : 2008-11-06
Age : 23
Location : On your mom

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Fri May 14, 2010 3:11 pm

Rommel I have taken your points and I believe I have fixed the errors you addressed, I now await your verdict and funny sticker that says APPROVED in some way if that happens, hell a giant DISAPPROVED sticker would also make me laugh.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Rommel

avatar

Posts : 50
Points : 30
Join date : 2010-03-13

PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   Sat May 15, 2010 11:54 am

APPROVED as a normal shinigami. To get a Captain's seat you will have to ask the Captain Commander.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe   

Back to top Go down
 
Ryudou Nagare (4th Division Captain App) Again hehe
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» Favorite Captain
» Captain. Cavaye, W.F. 107 th Foot.
» Captain Henry Boyd Sutherland 4th Regiment Foot
» Monument to Captain Edmund Verney Wyatt-Edgell,killed in action at Ulundi,Zululand,4 July 1879
» Captain James Scott (1821-1890), born Edinburgh, Scotland;enlisted as Private Royal Engineers

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Bleach Online :: Other :: Recycle Bin :: Registration :: Character Creation-
Jump to:  
Free forums hosting | © phpBB | Free forum support | Contact | Report an abuse | Free forum